The need to write

Well. I know it's been a long long time since I've written.
Today, however, it is an intense emergency for me to write my soul down. Whatever that means.

I want to believe in the Universe. In positve thinking. In health. In wealth. In Abundance. In positive everything.
Wanting to believe and believing are two different things I suppose.
There are days, or even moments in a day, where I feel so "in-tune" with the Universe.
Yet, there are still too many other instances where I simply feel lost.

Out of touch.
Alone.
Distressed.
Powerless.

I know there is a reason for everything.
I know I don't need to understand everything.

So. Where do I start. So much as happened since my last blog entry. I am being medically releases from the Canadian Forces. It's now official. Well. Whatever "official" means in the CF... the old saying goes like this " nothing is official until it's done and even then.. "....

The "official" date is supposed to be May 14th 2009. My plans? well, that's what they are, plans. I hope I'll be able to complete my Bachelor of Social Work and then work part-time in the field while completing my Master with the UPC between Georgian college and Windsor University.

Okay.

Then there was the car accident where a propane transporter cut me off and caused a side-collision. The minivan was damaged from front to back on the driver's side and is now @ the body shop. I got really scared.

then...

I'm still coping with ptsd and the pain from fibromyalgia and depression.

I feel like I'm soul searching and I also feel like losing myself in anything but my soul.

Drinking sounds like a good idea. I sometimes wish I didn't have a conscience.

That's it for now.

see you soon